Our identity is a mosaic of perceptions, which are renewed and enriched throughout our lives. Along the way, there are times when we are given the opportunity to choose the pieces that will make up our identity. However, other times, this choice is out of our control. A case as such is that of the influence we receive from our community; a community with its own customs and traditions, which unconsciously affects us since our birth and integration into it. Tradition is an early factor in the ‘list’ of factors that contribute to the cultivation of our character; the moral principles of a society and the way in which the people who participate in it are perceived are the first stimuli we receive. Our roots and what they stand for are one of the connecting links in our society. But what happens if we are in direct conflict with certain aspects of our traditions?
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Grandma’s cookies, as a dip in our Greek coffee in the mornings; the raki carafes with little snacks and relishes that grandpa will run to treat you with; the dances and traditional songs in our joy, the dirges in our sorrow; the local Easter sweets and delicacies; the traditional Christmas treats; the watermelon in our summers and many more, come to us from decades of customs and traditions. “You should try the traditional cheese of our region”, we are told when we visit this area, “there is no better way to make soutzoukakia!”, they say when we are offered some of the regional dishes to taste in another area. As long as you feel your roots, your particular identity and are filled with the bliss of the familiar, where does the risk of perpetuating values lie, and the problematic of the past appear?
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The perpetuation of the past is best considered in relation to the needs of the present. Customs and traditions that are passed from one generation to another are harmful only when they constitute obstacles to the happiness of the people of the generation that is flourishing. The traditional Christmas treats are no danger to a woman who decides to devote herself to her vision and not to think about starting a family; raki and wine will not stand in the way of the love of a same-sex couple; the carols sung by children on New Year’s Eve and the praises sung on Good Friday will not project gender stereotypes. Seventy years ago, they clinked red eggs on Easter Day, but women were not allowed to vote. For decades, deadly HIV has lurked in lovemaking between same-sex men, but part of our society panics at the idea of sex education in schools. Some ideas are ingrained in our society and lack the taste of the feta cheese in the Greek salad: they are tasteless and do not deserve to be in our lives. They neither offer evolution in society nor are they beneficial in achieving happiness; on the contrary, they make us uncomfortable and keep us stranded in a less tolerant and colorful past.
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Tradition may set finite roles and stereotypes, but it also sets character in our personality. I can choose to celebrate 15th of August both in the village and in a tavern by the sea. Therefore, I can choose freedom of expression and choice, instead of the informal social rules established and implemented by another era. A man who does not enjoy the combination of feta cheese and watermelon will enjoy the plain watermelon on an August evening with equal happiness. A woman who cannot express her love for another woman, or a person who cannot be self-defined within the given pronouns because “society didn’t use to be like that in the old days” or because “I have learned things differently”, will not be happy. In our limited number of years, happiness is our purpose and essence. As we are accustomed to respecting the customs of our country because they make us happy, let us learn to respect the happiness of others and our own.
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Author: Georgios Chomatas
